Calling out XM Canada, an old client at the Wilcox Group and something I subscribe to, for bad writing is painful but this is too good (bad) to pass up. I am indebted to my Humber College class for pointing it out—the individual herself will remain nameless to protect her later job prospects but thanks just the same. We review good and bad writing as a way of trying to articulate how it works or not. It was very clear to her that this did not adhere to what we learn as best practices. Here’s the story:

XM Canada Kicks Off Search for The Ultimate Soccer Party Guest with Online Video Challenge

Best Seats in the House Up for Grabs for 2010 FIFA World Cup Final Game at Wayne Gretzky’s Restaurant in Toronto

TORONTO, June 25 /CNW/ – There is no bigger event in sports than the FIFA World Cup(TM) and no better destination for sports fans than XM Canada(TM), the country’s leading audio entertainment company. In celebration of its in-depth sports coverage, from MLB(R) and The PGA TOUR(R) to the final 10 playoff matches of the 2010 FIFA World Cup South Africa, XM today kicked-off The Ultimate Soccer Party Guest Challenge in search of the best party guest in Canada. The lucky winner will celebrate the 2010 FIFA World Cup Final in front-row style with 24 friends at Wayne Gretzky’s Restaurant in Toronto on July 11th.

Note how many questions this writing raises:

1. There is no bigger event in sports than the FIFA World Cup(TM) Is that news? While it’s true now is it intrinsically reality at all times? Why begin with it; is it something editors need to be informed about while it’s happening? Why the TM? Not necessary in a news release, which isn’t advertising or marketing copy and never ever used in media. Just annoys editors who have to take it out.
2. And no better destination for sports fans (TM) than XM Canada, the country’s leading audio entertainment company. Another useless TM with more wasted commercial message.Where’s the news? Aren’t news releases supposed to start with the story? Are we reading an ad here?
3. In celebration of its in-depth sports coverage, from MLB(R) and The PGA TOUR(R) to the final 10 playoff matches of the 2010 FIFA World Cup South Africa…Still wondering what the story is and why we need to know about and celebrate MLB and PGA (in unnecessary caps, no less, and the two R marks, ever seen those in the news)? This is not inverted pyramid style, following news values, it’s the pyramid right side up.
4. XM today kicked-off The Ultimate Soccer Party Guest Challenge in search of the best party guest in Canada. The lucky winner will celebrate the 2010 FIFA World Cup Final in front-row style with 24 friends at Wayne Gretzky’s Restaurant Finally…some news! In the fifth line of the story. Not the biggest story in the world but certainly more useful to editors than ‘celebrating in-depth sports coverage.’

After considering writing various company leaders about this release, the class urged me contact the author directly to avoid creating difficulty for her and we said:

“Today in our PR writing class at Humber College, we were looking at examples of different types of PR writing and we came across your release for XM Canada and the best party guest competition. 

We were puzzled by your lead and second paragraph; it struck us that it buried the news and we were also wondering about the usage of TM in a news release when it is never published in media. 

Also the sentences appear to be lengthy as well as there were many company acronyms mentioned. 

Could you tell us for PR educational purposes what was your thought processes concerning this news release? Is there a specific format to be followed? What is the rationale for this style?”

She responded promptly with a certain candour:

“Thanks for your note.  I agree with your points about what typically are good approaches for releases. As I am sure you can understand, unfortunately, we can’t give you and your class much more context on how this specific release was developed due to standard confidentiality about client projects and processes.

I’d be more than happy to share our general point-of-view of writing for the media and social media.”

We will be inviting her soon….

Professor of PR, Humber College and PR Writer Extraordinaire

Here’s some ways I’ve used my iPad in its first week…

Walked into the Dean’s office at the college where I teach, and dazzled him with simply having an iPad a day or so after launch and he also appreciated its many fantastic features. Also showed the all-female media faculty the machine, with one person saying, “I didn’t think I’d get to see one for several weeks.” Another faculty member already had one from a U.S. purchase.

Sat on my front porch on a nice warm summery night, answering emails with my new case, which came separately, securing the pad. The case is useful; makes it a bit heavier but the feature by which it’s propped up makes it easier to type and to use as pad for notes when giving a talk. It came separately and when Sheldon, the FedEx guy delivered it, he asked what it was, as each iPad owner received a second shipment. I told him and then asked, “Did anyone show it to you?” and then told him to sit down on a chair next to me and showed him what magic he’d been delivering.

I am definitely in the habit of reading the media in the morning at breakfast with the iPad. I haven’t missed my daily newspaper delivery and in fact now believe the iPad is more convenient than a big broadsheet. I’ve read it on the subway, on a bus and well…in the bathroom.

Today, I had to deliver a talk to a small group of people and it wasn’t feasible to use a projector. I outlined my talk in Word, emailed to myself, then opened it in Pages—a great App, all for $9.99. It was a great way to have a prompter, as I flipped up the pages with my fingers and kept talking. I also looked quite au courant to media studies teachers.

Starting to replace some Blackberry usages with it, too. Calendar for sure. A calorie counter to watch my weight. Blackberry mail is great and convenient but do I need it? My kids and a close friend use Blackberry Messenger. But I could do without it. Thinking of cutting off those usages with Blackberry as much as I love them. Saved on newspaper purchases and on telecom too?

So after one week, what do I think of it? I agree with Walt Mossberg even more. It could “profoundly” change personal computing. Its size is very convenient and it’s so much better to use in a meeting than a laptop—and for sitting on a porch using WiFi, it’s not only less obtrusive but also more convenient. The main reason for which I purchased it—media and books—will come to pass. I like it. I wonder what the next improved versions will be like?

Prepared with the assistance of Humber PR grad student Heather Smith…

As the ever changing landscape of public relations continues to evolve, social media has become a central focus. From blogs to Twitter to Facebook, social media is being used like never before.

For businesses looking to capitalize on this fast-growing trend, there are several ways to go about it. Before the networking begins though, you must first consider the following.

• What is the goal of your social media campaign?
• What do you want to accomplish?
• Who is your target audience?
• Which social media networks are you going to use? Facebook? Twitter? MySpace?
• All of the above?

Once you have decided which social media networking sites you are going to use, you can get down to business. Outlined below are three of the most popular social networking tools used today. All three can aid in brand recognition and online social media marketing.

Twitter

A free social networking service, users post ‘tweets’ of 140 characters or less for other Tweeters to see. Businesses using Twitter can use the site to post ‘tweets’ about their company, topics relating to their company’s services, events, etc. Twitter can be used to publicize your company’s website or blog, and allows for optimal business marketing. Users can engage in conversations with other Tweeters, thus allowing for effective word of mouth marketing. Another benefit of Twitter, as with most social media services nowadays, is that posts are made seamlessly from wireless mobile devices. Users can post a comment from their BlackBerry, and instantly it appears on their Twitter page.

HOW TO: All new Twitter users must create an account. Following registration, one must begin to grow their contact list by following other users, and encouraging them to follow you. The more followers one has, the more opportunities exist for conversation and networking. Twitter offers several applications that can be used to better organize your contact list, for instance, Tweet Deck allows you to categorize incoming posts by topic.

Facebook

Another free social networking service, Facebook offers many more features than does Twitter. It is the ideal way for a company to build a fan following with features like fan pages and groups. Businesses can target users by demographic, age, interests, gender, etc. Fan pages and groups allow users to post pictures, videos, hold discussions and post information related to their company. Companies can create events and invite users to attend. They can create ads to market their company. The opportunities for SEO and brand recognition are endless.

HOW TO: First time Facebook users must create an account profile. This includes contact information, interests, etc. From there, users will start to build their contact list by adding friends to their list. Now, users can take advantage of the many features offered by Facebook. Create a fan page for your company, or a group pertaining to a topic of interest. Create events to launch or publicize a product. The more friends you have on your list, the more people there are to network with. Videos, photos and discussions go a long way in engaging current and prospective customers.

Blogs

The blogosphere is a never ending world of online commentary. Individuals can develop blogs, but so can companies. Blogs are a great way to post information relevant to the company’s products or services. You can post links to blogs on Facebook, Twitter and company websites. Blogs attract readers that can then contribute to the conversation, therefore building the company’s online reputation.

HOW TO: There are a variety of ways to start a blog. One must first contact a web host that will allow the blog to be accessible to the World Wide Web. Programs like WordPress are used to design and develop the blog. Graphics can be added and posts created. Depending on the purpose of the blog, web designers can tailor blogs based on the company’s business goals.

While there are tens of social networking sites that can be used in social media campaigns, the above are just three places to start. With millions of users, Twitter, Facebook and blogs can serve to increase brand recognition, improve sales, and encourage new customers.